Monday, August 01, 2005

Things Remembered

When the adoption is happening, the adoptive parents should encourage the birth parents to leave at least one letter and some pictures. These, without names, are called unidentifying materials and are stored with adoption records with the adoptive agency or the State Welfare Department.

Personally, I've requested these things after 54 years, and I'm excited to see if anything was left for me over a half a century ago.

Adopted children feel differently about adoption than their adopted parents. Belonging always has a hole in it for many adopted children. I remember once being told I could never join The Daughters of the American Revolution because I was adopted. Like I would.

The feeling of being outside the circle will eventually creep into the mind of an adopted child. Attachment is important. Knowing is important.

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